In this article, you will get 13 concrete tips from sleep coach Hanna Bergenkull on introducing new sleep routines for children. If you haven't read the article "When you want to get your messy sleep in order", we recommend that you do so first.

Checklist for better sleep for children

1. reflect on the fact that your child expresses different emotions
As a parent, it is easy to interpret all the negative emotions your baby expresses as "sad crying". But in fact, babies past the age of 6 months often express various forms of discontent instead.

• Sad/sad - your child is crying and sad because they are tired or unwell.
• Discontent - comes in several varieties such as whining, angry and grumpy.
• Furiously angry - "I don't want to!"

2: Learn to Listen, Interpret and Respond in different ways
When your child is sad, ask yourself "should I act right now or can I wait and see if they manage to get out of this feeling on their own?". Parenting is an interaction between helping and waiting to help/resolve the situation. If you want to improve sleep, you need to alternate between helping/supporting/distracting and waiting for the child to see if he/she can get out of this feeling of dissatisfaction on his/her own. If your child is crying, you need to act and comfort your child.

3: Can all emotions exist?
Living means feeling and expressing emotions. Consciously practicing listening and interpreting our children's signals opens up an interaction between protecting, helping and waiting, and allowing the child to cope with minor challenges on their own.

We will continue to protect and help. We will continue to comfort and care. But we also need to give our children time to try things out on their own, even if it means that our children express dissatisfaction in various forms from time to time.

4: Check that your child is fully healthy
Before you decide to introduce new sleep routines, you should be sure that there are no physical barriers such as allergies, ear, nose and throat problems (e.g. apnea), reflux, etc.

5: Black the bedroom at night
Because light, both daylight and light from lamps, sends signals to the brain to reduce the production of melatonin (which makes us tired), children with disturbed sleep or who wake up too early in the morning need to sleep in pitch-black bedrooms (up to the age of just over 2 years).

Children over 2 years of age are beginning to understand that dangers can lurk in the dark and may need some light to orient themselves in the bedroom. One suggestion is to shut out all daylight and leave the bedroom door slightly ajar, a ½ cm gap is enough, and a dim light shining somewhere outside the bedroom.

6: Decide the start date
Take out the calendar and see when in time it is practically possible to introduce new procedures. Doing so takes some time and with great care I recommend that you focus on the change for two weeks. You will see an improvement in your sleep within 2-6 days.

If you don't see any change within a week, there may be some bits you are missing and it is wise to pause, read and reflect, and then possibly continue the work.

7: Use Food and Sleep Clock
Following a clear schedule that is adapted to your child's age is an important part of getting messy sleep under control. Fixed feeding and sleeping times influence the circadian rhythm so that your child is appropriately hungry when it is time to eat and appropriately sleepy when it is time to sleep.

Also include daily outdoor time in the schedule, preferably 1 hour both in the morning and in the afternoon. Daylight and physical activity have a positive effect on circadian rhythms and sleep.

8: Physical touch - important when introducing new practices
Massaging, carrying in the arms, scratching the back, rhythmically bouncing the bottom or gently patting the head are examples of physical touch. What is best for your child depends on their personality and age. The physical touch is there to help your child out of the sad feelings or feelings of dissatisfaction and is an important part when introducing new routines.

9: Leave when your child is aware that you are doing so
Educators at our preschools remind us parents to say goodbye when we leave our child - even if it evokes strong emotions. Making your child aware that you are leaving gives the child a greater sense of control and from that control, security grows stronger. Separation anxiety decreases, confidence grows and calmness sets in.

Strive to leave the bedroom before she or he falls asleep. Let them know you are leaving by repeatedly saying, for example, "sleep tight - see you tomorrow".

10: Your Voice - a bridge between you and your child
Always tell your child that you are leaving the bedroom and make them aware that you are leaving. Use your voice as a mantra and repeat the same thing a few times in succession. Then be quiet and listen to how your child responds and reacts. After a while, if you think it is necessary, you can remind her or him that you are still outside the bedroom.

11: Interaction between physical touch and your voice
During the first week (and especially during the first 2-4 days) of introducing the new sleeping and napping routines, it is very important to be generous and witty, when needed, in going to your child and helping him/her get closer to sleep.

In parallel to working on the physical touch, you can work on your voice. Strive to gradually reduce the physical touch and let your voice take over more and more.

12: Patience
Replacing ingrained routines with new ones takes time and requires both determination and patience. Many families contact me and tell me that they have experienced a very positive development but that the bedtimes and wake-ups have increased. Try to be patient and if your gut feeling is right, my advice is that you continue with the new routines you have introduced.

13: Find ways to reduce stress levels
Finding ways to help yourself lower stress and reduce anxiety can help you improve your sleep. One relatively simple way is to spend a little time each day practicing mindful breathing.

It doesn't matter how you do it, but I really want to encourage you to take a moment every day for yourself - and when you can't get your day together, accept that you didn't get that moment. Start again tomorrow (or the next day...)

Hanna Bergenkull is a sleep coach, author of the book "Visst kan Lillis räv sova - din guide till bättre sömn" and founder of Sömnskolan. If you want to attend Sömnskolan live, the next event is in September.